Once Upon a Mattress

Three years ago we bought a memory foam mattress. For 2 years, we slept great. This past year, we elevated the mattress to help with my acid reflux and hiatal hernia and the mattress never recovered. It sloped and dipped and created a cavern in the middle where if we lost vigilance for one minute we sunk into the crevasse. Continue reading “Once Upon a Mattress”



Do you have a hard time sleeping at night? Suffer from anxiety? Listlessness? Self-loathing? A paralyzing certainty that the world is about to end, your fellow human is suffering, and you’re helpless to stop it? Continue reading “FONHO”

Never Go To Europe

When we decided to name this blog That Annoying Couple, I wanted to come up with a post that would live up to the title. And behold, I have done it. Let’s talk about the planning of our trip to Europe! Continue reading “Never Go To Europe”

My Favorite Songs of All-Time

Last week we were cruising around town, and, as is typical, I was in charge of providing the tunes for our drive—Kathleen, with the working eyes, naturally was in charge of the driving. Everything on the radio was terrible (D.C. radio is exceptionally shitty, FYI), so I took out my phone and put on a playlist I’d recently created on Spotify. Continue reading “My Favorite Songs of All-Time”

I Can Do This. Fuck You!

Last week I traveled to Chicago for work, and while I had a great time and ate my body-weight in pizza, this story isn’t about that. Rather, this is the story of how I almost punched a friend’s mother in the face. Continue reading “I Can Do This. Fuck You!”

Honorary Cajun

Paul and I met on Match.com. In the early days of our courtship, before I knew if he was a serial murderer who was going to cut me into tiny pieces and store me in his freezer, I chose our date locations with care. Continue reading “Honorary Cajun”

Two Gringos Walk Into…

6 years ago Paul and I went to get “authentic” Mexican food outside Philly. The place we chose was small and close-knit and, after about 40 minutes when no one had helped us, we turned to leave. As we walked out someone yelled, “They’ll probably be happier with Taco Bell anyway.” Continue reading “Two Gringos Walk Into…”